April 24, 2024, 11:39:20 PM
Forum Rules: Read This Before Posting


Topic: Men Strike Back!!!  (Read 5853 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline Donaldson Tan

  • Editor, New Asia Republic
  • Retired Staff
  • Sr. Member
  • *
  • Posts: 3177
  • Mole Snacks: +261/-13
  • Gender: Male
    • New Asia Republic
Men Strike Back!!!
« on: March 10, 2006, 11:58:09 AM »
< How many men does it take to open a beer?
> None. It should be opened when she brings it.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> Why is a Laundromat a really bad place to pick up a woman?
> Because a woman who can't even afford a washing machine will probably
> never be able to support you.
> --------------------------------------------------------------------

> Why do women have smaller feet than men?
> It's one of those "evolutionary things" that allows
> them to stand closer to the kitchen sink.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> How do you know when a woman is about to say something smart?
> When she starts a sentence with "A man once told me..."
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> How do you fix a woman's watch?
> You don't. There is a clock on the oven.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> Why do men fart more than women?
> Because women can't shut up long enough to
> build up the required pressure.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> If your dog is barking at the back door and your wife is yelling at the
> front door, who do you let in first?
> The dog, of course. He'll shut up once you let him in.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> What's worse than a Male Chauvinist Pig?
> A woman who won't do what she's told.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> I married a Miss Right.
> I just didn't know her first name was Always.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes
> a woman's sex drive by 90%.
> It's called a Wedding Cake.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> Why do men die before their wives?
> They want to.
> -------------------------------------------------------------------

> Women will never be equal to men until they can
> walk down the street with a bald head and a beer
> gut, and still think they are sexy.
"Say you're in a [chemical] plant and there's a snake on the floor. What are you going to do? Call a consultant? Get a meeting together to talk about which color is the snake? Employees should do one thing: walk over there and you step on the friggin� snake." - Jean-Pierre Garnier, CEO of Glaxosmithkline, June 2006

Offline Bakegaku

  • Full Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 269
  • Mole Snacks: +20/-5
  • Gender: Male
  • Hydrogen peroxide is my miracle cure to everything
Re:Men Strike Back!!!
« Reply #1 on: March 10, 2006, 01:53:22 PM »
I have a strange idea that this may develop into a flame war...
"True knowledge exists in knowing that you know nothing"
-Socrates

"I see, I forget.  I hear, I remember.  I do, I understand"
-Confucius

"Nothing will benefit human health and increase chances for survival of life on Earth as much as the evolution to a vegetarian diet."
- Albert Einstein?

"American cartoons place characters in situations; anime
places situations around characters.  Anime characters
are not like fictional characters but more like fictional
people; their actions stem directly from their personalities,
and not just as a means to move the story's plot
forward.  We are made to sympathize with them, and
not simply be entertained by them."
~John Oppliger~

Offline Kenichi

  • Regular Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 70
  • Mole Snacks: +6/-2
  • Gender: Male
Re: Men Strike Back!!!
« Reply #2 on: April 13, 2006, 07:05:59 AM »
Why don't women need driver's licenses?
   There is no road between the kitchen and the bedroom

another quick one....

  Women's rights!
Honor is what you know of yourself. Reputation is what others think they know about you. Live by honor and let your reputation lie where it may. And outlive the bastards.

One day I will rule the world with my army of a mole of moles!

Offline tamim83

  • Retired Staff
  • Full Member
  • *
  • Posts: 395
  • Mole Snacks: +67/-7
  • Gender: Female
  • Quantum Kitten
Re: Men Strike Back!!!
« Reply #3 on: April 13, 2006, 09:14:40 PM »
OK, I do have a sense of humor, those are pretty funny ;)  It is a humor forum, isn't it ;D

Offline constant thinker

  • mad scientist
  • Sr. Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1275
  • Mole Snacks: +85/-45
  • Gender: Male
Re: Men Strike Back!!!
« Reply #4 on: April 13, 2006, 09:19:00 PM »
I don't know about other guys, but personally I have no clue how to do laundry. Last time I tried I had black and blue fuzzes on my white shirts, white and blue fuzzes on my black shirts, and white and black fuzzes on my pants. Also some of my socks dissapeared..

I can cook, but only when I feel like it. Which isn't very often.
"The nine most terrifying words in the English language are, 'I'm from the government and I'm here to help.' " -Ronald Reagan

"I'm for anything that gets you through the night, be it prayer, tranquilizers, or a bottle of Jack Daniels." -Frank Sinatra

Offline Kenichi

  • Regular Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 70
  • Mole Snacks: +6/-2
  • Gender: Male
Re: Men Strike Back!!!
« Reply #5 on: January 16, 2007, 10:11:38 AM »
I just heard a few more last night.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive?

  Cause she was a woman!


How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

   None, feminists can't change anything!
Honor is what you know of yourself. Reputation is what others think they know about you. Live by honor and let your reputation lie where it may. And outlive the bastards.

One day I will rule the world with my army of a mole of moles!

Sponsored Links